Indecisiveness – Which Choice Should I Make?

Indecisiveness, how to make a choice?

My clients often come to me with the problem that they either don’t know how to make a choice, or they worry they make the wrong one. They may even ask me to make the choice for them. However, I never make choices for my clients – I teach them how to make these choices for themselves and guide them through the process. If I were to make choices for my clients they would be forever dependent on me as there will always be a new choice to make and this is of course not the goal of therapy.

There’s two important factors to consider:

1. Not knowing how to make a choice

This one is often closely tied to self-esteem. Do you know in general what you want from life? What is important to you? What are your values? These questions are in the core of self-esteem – knowing who we are and valuing ourselves. If this important pillar is missing we often struggle to make choices, simply because we don’t know what we want.

2. Making the wrong choice

 “People don’t make wrong choices” said my supervisor to me, “the choices may turn out to be wrong when we learn new information, but at the time we made the choice, it was the right choice to make”. How lucky am I to have someone so wise in my life?

I always tell my clients that when we make the choice we need to commit to it. If our thinking is in the “what if”, then we will never be satisfied with our choice. The important thing here is to let go of the “what if” of the other alternative we had and to commit on the one we chose. There are no wrong choices, and committing to the choice we make will help us feel more satisfied with the outcome.

Do you also feel indecisive sometimes? Does this post resonate with you? Share your thoughts in the comments!

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